( he wants to share with her everything: every pain and uncertainty that has been harshly dealt these past few days; every terrible, frightened, and anxious thought that has emerged from his spinning head. (he keeps those thoughts close. he always has. as a child beaten and a growing man silent in fear, he always has.
he has not kept them quiet from her. he wonders now if she wants to hear those hushed, thick whispers in the dark. if he can trust she wants his heart as she once did. it's hers; it's hers: that's how it beats, and he wants always to offer it.) perhaps those words will come. (that offering will come, vulnerable and longing in his eyes.) perhaps he will summon them or let them fall in snapped desperation soon, but for now all he wants — all he needs —
she holds him tighter and he feels that gaping emptiness weigh in him. he thinks of a life without his sister. he thinks with horror that one day they might all be gone. (his truest fear, come to life again and again. hope. elijah. hayley.) clementine. freya. caroline, the woman he holds so fiercely in his arms. they will fade away as easily as he met them here, and there will be nothing but this emptiness.
his arms are not empty now. there is solace in that. there is strength. he dips his head, presses his face into the curve of her neck. his breath is shaky but he breathes her in, his fingers crushing the soft curls in his grasp. )
bleary eyed and beautiful but your blade is not dull;
he has not kept them quiet from her. he wonders now if she wants to hear those hushed, thick whispers in the dark. if he can trust she wants his heart as she once did. it's hers; it's hers: that's how it beats, and he wants always to offer it.) perhaps those words will come. (that offering will come, vulnerable and longing in his eyes.) perhaps he will summon them or let them fall in snapped desperation soon, but for now all he wants — all he needs —
she holds him tighter and he feels that gaping emptiness weigh in him. he thinks of a life without his sister. he thinks with horror that one day they might all be gone. (his truest fear, come to life again and again. hope. elijah. hayley.) clementine. freya. caroline, the woman he holds so fiercely in his arms. they will fade away as easily as he met them here, and there will be nothing but this emptiness.
his arms are not empty now. there is solace in that. there is strength. he dips his head, presses his face into the curve of her neck. his breath is shaky but he breathes her in, his fingers crushing the soft curls in his grasp. )